You know how, when you walk into a room and you can totally tell that people are talking about you. Then they continue trying to ploy you into the conversation like it totally wasn't you they were talking about so they ask you, "So, you know what a 'butter face' is, right?" So then you try to ignore them and not become the unknowing butt of their joke and avoid at all costs playing into their game, but they contine, "When everything looks good 'but her face', hahaha." Then you really want to believe they weren't talking about you as you crawl under your desk and cry and then cry even more because these shallow dickheads affected you this why, and then you're just angry and want to stomp bunnies for being so cute.

Happy Wednesday folks, don't mind the fuzzy cottontailed blood stains.

2 more lbs. gone. Also got into some jeans I haven't in a while. Once again wondering who can actually wear the low low rise? Oh, maybe the non-sitters, non-benders, non-shoe tiers, non-kid carriers. I don't think I could even march in some of them, because, you know, I do like the marching.

hear the bitches say,"Go put the present on her desk and say 'sorry, we would have came, but we weren't invited.' " This from the Petty Patrol who didn't get invited to the shower of the coworker they don't know and can barely muster a 'hi' for but are pissed nonetheless because it is one less person that will feel obligated to get them a reciprocal wedding shower gift.

The plague has hit our house so the hubby and I are taking Friday off to spend it together. I don't believe we've had a mutual day off since the holidays wizzed by. But, there's nothing like snot, phlegm, crying, hacking, ear infections, nebulizer treatments, antibiotics and steroids to bring us together.

Oh, and the codeine cough syrup. Shhhhh

New guy to Jane:

Is there a place I can post something to sell here?

Umm, huh?

Well, I have a Zune and an Ipod and I like the Ipod better so I'd like to sell the Zune.

Oh, well, there are bulletin boards there and there (pointing).

And it's ok to post things to sell there?

Yeah, but I'd draw the lines at drugs and prostitution.

I . . . uh, uh . . . I don't think that will be an issue (strange looks and backing away ensue).

Seriously, I've forgotten. I had an out-of-town friend visit this weekend. It was fab, we went out, we drank, we laughed, we ate really bad truck stop breakfast, and then we did a mini-version the next night, or at least I did, because I'm old - she's not, she's 3 months younger and those are some very aging months.

Earlier in the week the our pediatrician suggested keeping the Little Man up until 10 or 11 pm instead of his usual 7 or 8 pm. Because he had been getting up regularly at midnight and 4am (at least) and then up for the day at 7 or 8 am. Ok, doc, we'll give it a try, especially since I will be out painting the town magenta with my young friends from the old school.

Friday
8:30 pm - I go out
2 am - I get home, babe is up, we play
3 am - I put him down
3:30, 4, 4:30, 5:15, 6, 6:45 - babe needs feeding, changing, whatever
7 am - Hello cartoon day

Saturday (make promise to have short night)
10 pm - go out
11:30 pm - call hubby to come get me, friend stays with babes
midnight - home
12:30 pm - go to bed after watching Simpsons, read a little, fall asleep
1:30, 2, 2:45, 3:30, 5, 6 - feed babe, change babe, get barfed on by babe
6:30 am - Hello CBS Sunday Morning show

Thanks doc, um, how about some tranq.s next time.

Friends are picked by common interest, humor, priorities, activities etc. We, of course, have differences, that's what makes these relationships interesting and also helps us appreciate each other as individuals. Family, you don't get that and the extended family is definitely a toss up.

Whether we all have children, live in the same town and know the same people isn't always enough to make a great bond or enough of a common ground to walk upon together. Clashes are easy and when your lip starts to bleed it's so tough to keep biting it. But, I'm working on it. I've wasted too much energy in crabbing and stewing and dwelling. There's nothing I do but point out downfalls (which is soooo efficient and does so much good) so I need to embrace the adage: "When you can't say anything nice . . . "

Silence is definitely deafening.

How exactly does a baby manage to spit up peas on the top of his own head?

Now that I (say I) am done having babies, I've decided it's time to put out the search for those staples every girl needs in her wardrobe. The body is not exactly finished being polished - through exercise and minor diet changes I'll get there. This won't stop me from finding a few items that are desperately needed and I plan on taking my time (for financial and practical reasons) feeling in those gaps.

I have a new long warm wool trench (thank J.Lo) that should last through many cold snaps and nights when I do need to dress up a bit. I have some great, but cheap, go to pumps for those (very few) special occasions. I have a couple dresses (that have never been worn) and a couple awesome skirts. My next quest are jeans and I asked Amy and her Foxy Mamas to help me out. They have some great, grrrrrreat suggestions that I will be perusing as soon as funds are available, that or my gawd-awful standbys fall off into so much denim dust in the wind.

Since I'm one to go up and down 5 lbs. in a day I haven't wanted to jump the gun too much in reporting any small weight loss. But, I'm happy to say the scale dipped a bit so I feel confident in saying, Yeah! 5(ish) lbs. lost - which only really pushes me down into a different range of 5 lbs. gained and lost and gained in one day. But, it's something.

My first good point after starting this bit of an exercise regime and reigning in my food free-for-all (started well before my 2 1/2 yr old daughter was conceived) is that my energy is up. Up from -79. This is the most awesome thing compared to where I was even 2 mo. ago. No, I'm not running circles, my house isn't spotless - that's for sure. But to just have a bit more energy to play with the kiddos, to not feel drop dead upon waking (though it's usually only on 4-5 hrs sleep) is fantastic.

What I've been doing is:
- exercise: hitting the gym for no more than 45 min. (usually only 30) some weeks 4 times, others only 2. Doing a 40 min. yoga tape once a week (sometimes more). My daughter likes to do bits of it along with me.
- food: I don't deprive - that's for sure. But I've been adding more fresh fruits and vegetables, only diet soda or coffee (something must combat the lack in the sleeping dept.), not as much booze (I like to save up those points) and lots of whole grains, more protein in nut, bean and rice form. Plus fiber.
- supplements: I'm still taking prenatals - think I'll stick with those well after I'm done nursing. Fish oil (only at night, or only after eating) and some B6.
- knitting: cuts down my noshing in front of the TV.
- reading more: cuts down on TV time which in turn cuts down on mindless snacking (when I'm not knitting).
- mind set: the "example" thing and every minute is a new minute, every hour a new hour, every day a new day. This way I don't get discouraged if I have a bad evening or eat a candy bar crushed over a bowl of ice cream to wash down the salty nachos I just ate. Mmmm
- having kids: "set an example" is a good mantra to keep in mind.

My favorites: Caribou Coffee granola bars - caffeine and crunch - instead of a candy bar
Red peppers - raw or cooked
Pink Lady apples
Breakfast burritos - endless possibilities
Sandwiches - roast beef, turkey or veggie
Diet Coke and a piece of dove chocolate - like peas and carrots or PB&J
Grilled Snack Wraps from McDonalds
Fruit and Yogurt Parfait from McDonalds - for quick and cheap when I'm crunched for time

"You just have to accept that I'm the rational one in the family."
"Hah!" (or some other audible guffaw)
"Well I'm definitely the practical one."
"Hmm"
"Ok, so practically rational."

Couple items from "Little Miss" this week.

Bed Time: I had fed the Little Man and was going to lay him down in his crib in their shared room. Knowing Little Miss had not drifted off yet I kissed my hand and bent down to touch it to her cheek (like I always do) and then walked out and started to close the door. Still mad at me for rinsing her toothbrush before she was ready she runs to the door and says very sternly, "Take my kiss back." She reaches out her hand and hands me back the kiss. Too tired to be hurt I take it back. She then goes to close the door and I brace it so that it doesn't slam. She shuts it completely then opens it quickly and commands, "No! Like this." And slowly shuts it just to the point before it latches. I throw up my hands and turn around shaking my head. I hear her door open again and a meek little voice commands, "Cover me up."

So I got twins (personalities) in one little girl.

Then, today as we are getting ready for a shower. She giggles and says, "Ahhh, Mama's BIIIIG butt with a BIIIIIG cut in it."

Thanks for the pep talk Miss. I'll be renewing that gym membership for sure now.

Last night, after going to bed hella-early, I wake up and go downstairs for some water. The Hubby and his Same-same are on the computer. I ask Same-same what he's doing. "Oh, just watching, (Hubby) is a snake charmer with this code."
"Um, I don't want to hear about your and his "snake charming."

So the same-same asked me what I want for my birthday. I reply: Unicorns.

"Like these unicorns?" She replies.

Seems to me they were getting things right? Why the extinction then?

and for those keeping track: muscle relaxers, and espresso machine and a Dyson DC-17 Animal also made the list.

On an especially restless night for the jumbo babe (meaning no one slept) at our house I had a series of dreams.

Leading up to this night we had been having a series of meetings on an entertainment section of our local publication. It was an exciting time at the office.

The first time the babe awoke crying I dreamt that he had been wracking his brain trying to figure out just how to fill the first page with Sienna Miller. The next time he awoke it was the 2nd page and so on with the 3rd and 4th page. Each time he'd fall back asleep I dreamt he had reached his goal and figured out the perfect photo to text ratio and was still able to fit in all the images of Sienna that he had wanted to - all this while he sat at a conference and wailed when he didn't get his way, or things just weren't working out. Very productive for a 6 month old.

The hubby came home from another computer job at this really nice, generous Chinese man's place. He is very sweet and always gives the hub some Asian wafer cookies in various flavors: vanilla, chocolate, strawberry. He thinks our children enjoy them, but really they never make it to the munchkins. We devour them and their sugary airy goodness. But tonight there was a new flavor, "Durian."
Hub: It's like feet and ass and . . . .
Me: Your breath.
Hub: Ha
Me: Like all the Mountain Dew and cigarettes and coffee got together and partied til they all got sick and then they partied some more.

I kill me.

Last night - at one point - for approximately 1 hour (amongst the hours 3, 4 or 5 am), I was alone in my queen size bed. Not one to take such an event for granted I deliberately laid diagonal with outstretched arms and legs and let my self sink softly, warmly in. There were no shorty legs flopping over my face. No jaggy teeth gnoshing on my nips. No dank dungeon breath sweeping passed my nose. It was a peace I embraced comfortably - knowing it would not last which made it better. If this were the norm, it means my life would be emptier, lonelier, duller. But for that moment it was sweet.